Changing My Major lyrics
Changing My Major
What happened last night?
Are you really here? Joan, Joan, Joan, Joan, Joan,
Hi Joan! Don’t wake up Joan!
Oh my god, last night. Omigod omigod omigod omigod last night.
I got so excited. I was too enthusiastic.
Thank you for not laughing.
Well, you laughed a little bit at one point when I was touching you
And said I might lose consciousness,
Which you said was adorable, and I just have to trust
that you don’t think I’m an idiot or some kind of an animal.
I’ve never lost control due to overwhelming lust, but I must say that
I’m changing my major to Joan.
I’m changing my major to sex with Joan.
I’m changing my major to sex with Joan,
With a minor in kissing Joan.
Foreign studies to Joan inner thighs.
A seminar on Joan’s ass in her Levi’s,
And Joan’s crazy brown eyes. Joan,
I feel like Hercules oh god, that sounds ridiculous.
Just keep on sleeping through this,
And I’ll work on calming down, So by the time you’ve woken up,
I’ll be cool; I’ll be collected.
And I’ll have found some dignity, but who needs dignity?
Cause this is so much better.
I’m radiating happiness.
Will you stay here with me for the rest of the semester?
We won’t need any food. We’ll live on sex alone.
Sex with Joan!
I am writing a thesis on Joan.
It’s a cutting edge field, and my mind is blown.
I would gladly stay up every night
And hone my compulsory skills with Joan.
I will study my way down her spine.
Familiarize myself with her well-made outline,
while she researches mine.
I don’t know who I am. I’ve become someone new.
Nothing I just did is anything I would do.
Overnight, everything changed. I am not prepared.
I’m dizzy. I’m nauseous. I’m shaking. I’m scared.
Am I falling in to nothingness,
or flying into something so sublime?
I don’t know, but I’m changing my major to Joan.
I thought all my life I’d be all alone,
But that was before I was lying prone in this dorm room bed with Joan.
Look, she’s drooled on the pillow, so sweet.
All sweaty and tangled up in my bedsheets.
And my heart feels complete.
Let’s never leave this room.
How about we stay here til finals?
I’ll go to school forever.
I’lll take out a dementedly huge high interest loan
Cause I’m changing my major to Joan.
Last Update: June, 12th 2015