Getting Married Today Lyrics
Getting Married Today
CHOIRGIRL:Bless this day,
Pinnacle of life,
Husband joined to wife.
The heart leaps up to behold
This golden day.
PAUL:
Today is for Amy,
Amy, I give you the rest of my life,
To cherish and to keep you, to honor you forever.
Today is for Amy,
My happily soon-to-be wife.
AMY:
Pardon me, is everybody there? Because if everybody's there, I want to thank you all for coming to the wedding, I'd appreciate your going even more, I mean you must have lots of better things to do, and not a word of this to Paul, remember Paul, you know, the man I'm gonna marry, but I'm not, because I wouldn't ruin anyone as wonderful as he is
But I thank you all
For the gifts and the flowers,
Thank you all,
Now it's back to the showers,
Don't tell Paul,
But I'm not getting married today.
CHOIRGIRL:
Bless this day,
Tragedy of life,
Husband yoked to wife.
The heart sinks down and feels dead
This dreadful day.
AMY:
Listen, everybody, look, I don't know what you're waiting for, a wedding, what's a wedding, it's a prehistoric ritual where everybody promises fidelity forever, which is maybe the most horrifying word I ever heard of, which is followed by a honeymoon, where suddenly he'll realize he's saddled with a nut, and wanna kill me, which he should--
So listen, thanks a bunch,
But I'm not getting married--
Go have lunch,
'Cause I'm not getting married--
You've been grand,
But I'm not getting married--
Don't just stand there,
I'm not getting married--
And don't tell Paul,
But I'm not getting married today.
Go, can't you go?
Why is no-
Body listening?
Goodbye,
Go and cry
At another person's wake.
If you're quick,
For a kick,
You could pick
Up a christening,
But please,
On my knees,
There's a human life at stake!
Listen everybody, I'm afraid you didn't hear, or do you want to see a crazy lady fall apart in front of you, it isn't only Paul who may be ruining his life, you know we'll both of us be losing our identities, I telephoned my analyst about it and he said to see him Monday, but by Monday I'll be floating in the Hudson with the other garbage--
I'm not well,
So I'm not getting married--
You've been swell,
But I'm not getting married--
Clear the hall,
'Cause I'm not getting married--
Thank you all,
But I'm not getting married--
And don't tell Paul,
But I'm not getting married today.
CHOIRGIRL:
Bless this bride,
Totally insane,
Slipping down the drain.
And bless this day in our hearts
As it starts
To rain.
PAUL: Today is for Amy
AMY: Go, can't you go?
PAUL: Amy, I give you the rest of my life
AMY: Look, you know
I adore you all
But why
Watch me die,
Like Eliza on the ice?
PAUL: To cherish and to keep you, to honor you forever
AMY:Look, perhaps
I'll collapse
In the apse
Right before you all,
PAUL: Today is for Amy, my happily, soon-to-be wife
AMY:So take
Back the cake,
Burn the shoes
and boil the rice.
Look, I didn't wanna have to My adorable
tell you, but I may be coming Wife.
down with Hepatitis, and I
think I'm gonna faint, so if
you wanna see me faint, I'll
do it happily, but wouldn't
it be funnier to go and watch
a funeral, so thank you for the
twenty-seven dinner plates,
thirty-seven butter knives,
forty-seven paperweights,
fifty-seven candleholders--
PAUL:
One more thing--
AMY:
I am not getting married!
CHOIR:
Amen!
PAUL:
Softly said--
AMY:
But I'm not getting married!
CHOIR:
Amen!
PAUL:
With this ring--
AMY:
Still I'm not getting married!
CHOIR:
Amen!
PAUL:
I thee wed.
AMY:
See, I'm not getting married!
CHOIR:
Amen!
PAUL: AMY:
Let us pray Let us pray
That we are getting married That I'm not getting married
Today! Today!
CHOIR:
AMEN!!!
(Not) Getting Married Today: Song Overview

Review and Highlights

Quick summary
- A turbocharged patter number from Stephen Sondheim’s Company (1970), delivered by the character Amy in the original staging.
- Counterpoint structure: Amy’s machine-gun monologue collides with Paul’s steady vows and a church soprano’s serene benedictions.
- The 2018 London revival flips Amy to Jamie, reframing it as a same-sex wedding; the Broadway transfer made that version central.
- A demanding showpiece: clean diction, airtight rhythm, long phrases, and precise breath planning separate a solid rendition from a train wreck.
- Beyond the laughs, the lyric maps panic, self-sabotage, and the clash between private fear and public ritual.
Creation History
On the original 1970 cast album for Company, produced by Thomas Z. Shepard for Columbia Masterworks and conducted by Harold Hastings, “Getting Married Today” arrives like a jolt of espresso in the middle of Act 1. Jonathan Tunick’s orchestration sets a nimble, bright backdrop for Beth Howland’s patter, Steve Elmore’s steadying warmth as Paul, and Teri Ralston’s serene church-soloist line. The number’s comic architecture is all collision: secular jitters pinging off sacred ritual, breathless chatter against a floating chant, and a groom’s calm assurances that can’t quite pierce the fog of anxiety.
Later reimaginings reshaped the context but preserved the engine. Marianne Elliott’s London revival in 2018 re-genders Amy to Jamie, and the lyrical frame updates accordingly. When that production crossed to Broadway, the same swap kept the scene’s humor and velocity while surfacing new social meaning.
Song Meaning and Annotations

Plot
The church is prepared, the guests are seated, and Paul radiates patient kindness. Amy, however, is sprinting in place. Her patter unspools a full-blown panic attack disguised as party conversation. She thanks people for coming while begging them to leave, imagines calamity in every tradition, and frames herself as the wrong person for a good man. The joke lands because the music won’t let her settle: every thought triggers a jump cut to another, until the whole edifice of ceremony feels like a funhouse mirror.
Song Meaning
At heart the song is a study in commitment fear. Amy’s runaway diction mimics a mind that can’t land, and the counterpoint soprano acts like cultural wallpaper - polite ritual that keeps rolling whether or not the bride can breathe. The groom’s interjections are affectionate but, from Amy’s vantage, impossibly rehearsed. Her crisis isn’t a value judgment on marriage as a whole; it’s a self-lacerating conviction that she will fail the test. The laugh lines sugarcoat a darker suspicion: that love requires stability she doesn’t trust in herself.
Annotations
Pardon me, is everybody here? / Because if everybody's here / I want to thank you all for coming to the wedding / I'd appreciate your going even more
The opening gambit plays like cocktail chatter but functions as triage. She’s both hosting and ejecting the room, a social reflex and a survival tactic.
This is a prehistoric ritual / Where everybody promises fidelity forever / Which is maybe the most horrifying word I ever heard
By calling the wedding “prehistoric,” Amy casts it as a fossilized ritual. The rhyme scheme tightens as the fear sharpens, and the patter line squeezes the breath - theatrical form mirroring psychology.
Which is followed by a honeymoon where suddenly he’ll realize / He’s saddled with a nut and want to kill me, which he should
Classic self-sabotage. Amy reroutes all threat through herself, protecting Paul in the story she tells even as she demolishes her own worth. That tilt is why audiences often find her sympathetic in the middle of her chaos.
Thank you all for the gifts and the flowers / Thank you all, now it’s back to the showers
“Showers” doubles as bridal and baby. The image zooms out to a social calendar where friends cycle through milestones, upping the pressure to conform.
The heart sinks, the day darkens, the thunder starts to roll
Weather cues often creep into productions - sometimes literally in sound design - as if the sky itself registers her dread. The appearance of storm can be staged or simply implied by the accelerating accompaniment.
Eliza on the ice
A wink to Uncle Tom’s Cabin, equating escape across floating ice with a dash through the church apse. It’s not subtle, but panic rarely is.
Other details snap modern context into place: the therapist reference fits a mid-century New York milieu where analysis connoted status as much as care; “yoked” has a barbed agrarian connotation; rice and shoes flip to domestic functions (cook it, burn them) as a rejection of ritual itself. The pace does the talking - lines clamp down, phrases stack, and consonants ping like typewriter keys. The faster the text, the thinner the margin for breath, which is exactly how panic feels.

Deep-dive analysis
Genre and engine
This is a Broadway patter showpiece fused with legit soprano counterpoint and conventional love-lyric fragments. The motor is rhythmic density: a stream of syllables where comedy depends on surgical consonants and metronomic subdivision. Underneath, the pit treats time like taut wire - tight staccatos, quick articulations, and sudden rests that make the next burst pop.
Emotional arc
Amy starts social, slides into clinical self-diagnosis, then hits an almost fatalistic acceptance that paints the wedding as a vigil for her independence. When the church soprano floats a halo over the scene, the dissonance heightens: an anthem glued on top of a meltdown.
Key phrases and symbols
- “Prehistoric ritual” - signals a mismatch between contemporary autonomy and inherited ceremony.
- “Yoked” - evokes forced labor, not partnership; the word choice is satiric and bitter.
- Weather cues - thunder and rain externalize the inner storm; many productions lean into the sound gag for timing.
- “Eliza on the ice” - comic hyperbole that codes flight, danger, and a leap across breaking ground.
Performance practice
Directors often calibrate Amy’s patter speed not by raw BPM but by intelligibility. The sweet spot: fast enough to feel unhinged yet clear enough for punchlines to land. The church soprano should stay imperturbable, the joke being that nothing - not even a public unraveling - interrupts the hymn of social expectation. Paul’s warmth functions as ballast. If he plays it too broad the scene goes syrupy; if he’s too cool, the heartbreak disappears.
Key Facts
- Artist: Original Broadway Cast of Company - Beth Howland, Steve Elmore, Teri Ralston
- Featured: Church soloist line by Teri Ralston; groom’s line by Steve Elmore
- Composer: Stephen Sondheim
- Producer: Thomas Z. Shepard
- Release Date: May 13, 1970
- Genre: Broadway, Musical Theatre
- Instruments: Pit orchestra with woodwinds, brass, strings, percussion, rhythm section
- Label: Columbia Masterworks
- Mood: Frenetic, satiric, anxious, witty
- Length: Approx. 4:09 (OBC album)
- Track #: OBC numbering varies by release; typically mid-Act 1 placement
- Language: English
- Album: Company - Original Broadway Cast Recording
- Music style: Patter song with contrapuntal hymn interlude
- Poetic meter: Rapid colloquial prose with internal rhyme; mixed meter feel over 4/4
Canonical Entities & Relations
- Stephen Sondheim - wrote music and lyrics for Company.
- Beth Howland - originated Amy on the cast album; sings the patter lead.
- Steve Elmore - sings Paul’s wedding vows sections.
- Teri Ralston - provides the church soprano countermelody.
- Jonathan Tunick - orchestrated the score.
- Harold Hastings - musical director and conductor on the recording.
- Thomas Z. Shepard - produced the original cast album.
- Marianne Elliott - directed the 2018 London revival that re-gendered Amy to Jamie.
- Jonathan Bailey - performed Jamie in London, including this number.
- Matt Doyle - performed Jamie on Broadway in the transfer.
- Columbia Masterworks - label that issued the original album.
- Company - the musical containing the song.
Questions and Answers
- Why has this number become a rite of passage for musical theatre performers?
- Because success hinges on clarity at velocity: relentless syllables, clean consonants, and perfect rhythm. The patter’s comedy evaporates if words blur, so performers must keep every thought crystalline even at breakneck pace.
- What makes the structure so effective onstage?
- Counterpoint. Amy’s spiral meets a serene church line and the groom’s steady declarations. Three emotional realities coexist, which keeps the scene funny and nerve-prickling at once.
- How did the 2018 revival change the context?
- By making Amy into Jamie and presenting a same-sex couple at the altar. The shift reframes the panic without muting the humor, placing contemporary relationships at the center of a classic score.
- Is Amy attacking marriage?
- Not exactly. She’s indicting her own readiness and the pressure of ritual. The satire targets the mismatch between inner doubt and public ceremony.
- Where else has the song appeared?
- It has popped up in television performance contexts and revues, including a heavily discussed staging in a hit musical TV series as well as Julie Andrews’s 1993 revue album Putting It Together.
- What is the typical tempo zone?
- It varies by production and vocalist. Cast-album and revue recordings place it roughly in the 130-165 BPM range, with some versions a touch quicker or slower to preserve intelligibility.
- Why does the church soprano sound almost detached?
- That’s the point: ritual keeps moving while Amy stalls. The contrast produces humor and highlights how public forms can eclipse private panic.
Awards and Chart Positions
While the specific track did not chart as a standalone single, the re-gendered revival anchored two award-winning star turns. Jonathan Bailey earned London’s top theatre prize for his performance in the 2018 production, and the Broadway transfer brought a matching accolade for Matt Doyle. The cast album’s original release date is well documented by the label’s archive.
| Award | Recipient | Production | Category | Date |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Laurence Olivier Award | Jonathan Bailey | Company (West End, Gielgud Theatre) | Best Actor in a Supporting Role in a Musical | April 7, 2019 |
| Tony Award | Matt Doyle | Company (Broadway revival) | Best Performance by an Actor in a Featured Role in a Musical | June 12, 2022 |
How to Sing Getting Married Today
Short answer: plan the breath like a pit drummer plans sticking. Longer answer below.
Vocal range, key, tempo
- Range: Common Amy renditions sit in the mid-to-upper female range; the Jamie version often sits in baritenor territory. Many arrangements hover roughly from F#3 to F#4 for simplified excerpts, with production keys adjusted to singer strengths.
- Key: Frequently performed around F sharp major in original-style casts; some audition cuts and educational arrangements sit around E major; certain Jamie cuts start as low as B flat major for baritenor.
- Tempo: Commercial recordings vary widely by artist and staging, typically landing between about 130 and 165 BPM. Choose a tempo that preserves crisp intelligibility.
Step-by-step HowTo
- Tempo calibration: Start slow with a click at 90-100. Increase by 4-6 BPM increments only when every consonant is legible.
- Diction map: Mark consonant clusters (thank-you-all, prehistoric-ritual, fidelity-forever). Practice as spoken rhythm on pitch before full singing.
- Breath strategy: Pre-plan micro sips before long chains. Use unvoiced consonants to sneak air. Keep rib cage buoyant; avoid vertical neck tension.
- Flow and rhythm: Subdivide in 16ths for the patter; keep the jaw loose and tongue forward. Aim for legato thought, staccato diction.
- Accents and comedy: Land key stress words (“prehistoric,” “fidelity,” “horrifying”). Comedy is in clarity plus timing, not in speed alone.
- Ensemble balance: Rehearse cue-ins with the church soprano line and the groom. You must leave space for their interjections and stay married to the bar count.
- Mic technique: If amplified, back off slightly on dense clusters to avoid blur; face the audience for tongue-heavy phrases.
- Common pitfalls: Racing the band; dropping final consonants; locking the jaw; pushing support at the end of phrases.
Practice materials: Click track at three tempos (120, 140, 160); a marked script with breath and stress arrows; slow metered read-throughs before adding pitch; and a recording of your own rehearsal to audit intelligibility.
Additional Info
Julie Andrews recorded a version for her 1993 revue album Putting It Together, a crisp lessons-in-diction take that has been a reference point for many students. According to coverage in British press, director Marianne Elliott’s London revival was built on a close collaboration with Stephen Sondheim about rethinking gender and perspective. As stated in one long-running U.K. newspaper’s 2019 awards report, the London staging took home Best Musical Revival with individual acting honors attached, and the Broadway transfer continued that streak. For the Broadway run, numerous outlets noted that Matt Doyle’s performance of this number became the nightly stop-the-show moment. In a U.S. theatre magazine interview around the Tonys, he described calibrating the ending’s tone so the release felt joyous rather than punitive. Rolling Stone’s theatre coverage in 2022 also highlighted how the revival reframed relationship dynamics for modern audiences.
Sources: Masterworks Broadway; Official London Theatre; The Guardian; Billboard; Tony Awards; Broadway.com; BroadwayWorld; Interview Magazine; Spotify editorial pages; AllMusic; SongBPM and Musicstax.