What makes the “Gaston” lyrics so sticky onstage?

The repeating template, “No one’s…,” turns bragging into a call-and-response chant, stacking jokes and giving the chorus a shoutable spine.

Who leads the Broadway recording, and how is it different from the film cut?

Burke Moses and Kenny Raskin headline the Broadway cast album. The stage version thickens the orchestration, enlarges the ensemble, and builds physical gags for a live audience.

Is “Gaston” a waltz?

It rides a triple meter that moves like a pub waltz, which keeps the boasting buoyant and danceable.

Did the number travel beyond Broadway?

Yes. The 2017 live-action film features Luke Evans and Josh Gad, and ABC’s 2022 anniversary special staged it with Joshua Henry.

Where does “Gaston” sit in the story arc?

It follows Belle’s rejection, with the town inflating Gaston’s ego before the plot sharpens into a mob scene.

Gaston Lyrics – Disney's Beauty And The Beast

Gaston Lyrics

Gaston:
Who does she think she is?
That girl has tangled with the wrong man!
LeFou:
Darn right.
Gaston:
No one says "no" to Gaston!
Dismissed! Rejected!
Publicly humiliated! Why, it's more than I can bear.
LeFou:
More beer?
Gaston:
What for? Nothing helps. I'm disgraced.
LeFou:
Who, you? Never! Gaston, you've got to pull yourself together.
Lefou:
Gosh it disturbs me to see you, Gaston
Looking so down in the dumps
Ev'ry guy here'd love to be you, Gaston
Even when taking your lumps
There's no man in town as admired as you
You're ev'ryone's favorite guy
Ev'ryone's awed and inspired by you
And it's not very hard to see why
No one's slick as Gaston
No one's quick as Gaston
No one's neck's as incredibly thick as Gaston's
For there's no man in town half as manly
Perfect, a pure paragon!
You can ask any Tom, Dick or Stanley
And they'll tell you whose team they prefer to be on

Lefou and Chorus:
No one's been like Gaston
A king pin like Gaston
LeFou:
No one's got a swell cleft in his chin like Gaston
Gaston:
As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidating!
Lefou and Chorus:
My what a guy, that Gaston!
Give five "hurrahs!"
Give twelve "hip-hips!"
LeFou:
Gaston is the best
And the rest is all drips
Chorus:
No one fights like Gaston
Douses lights like Gaston
LeFou:
In a wrestling match nobody bites like Gaston!
Bimbettes:
For there's no one as burly and brawny
Gaston:
As you see I've got biceps to spare
LeFou:
Not a bit of him's scraggly or scrawny
Gaston:
That's right!
And ev'ry last inch of me's covered with hair
Chorus:
No one hits like Gaston
Matches wits like Gaston
LeFou:
In a spitting match nobody spits like Gaston
Gaston:
I'm espcially good at expectorating!
Ptoooie!
Chorus:
Ten points for Gaston!
Gaston:
When I was a lad I ate four dozen eggs
Ev'ry morning to help me get large
And now that I'm grown I eat five dozen eggs
So I'm roughly the size of a barge!
Chorus:
Oh, ahhh, wow!
My what a guy, that Gaston!
No one shoots like Gaston
Makes those beauts like Gaston
LeFou:
Then goes tromping around wearing boots like Gaston
Gaston:
I use antlers in all of my decorating!
Chorus:
My what a guy,
Gaston!
Last Update: August, 23rd 2025

Song Overview

Gaston lyrics by Original Broadway Cast of Beauty and the Beast — Original Broadway Cast of Beauty and the Beast brings the ‘Gaston’ lyrics to the tavern floor.

Built for stage swagger and comic bite, “Gaston” turns a village pub into a drumline for bravado. On the 1994 cast album, the number lands as a rowdy roll call of masculine myth-making, complete with spit takes, antlers, and a baritone who treats self-regard like a contact sport.

Personal Review

Let’s keep it simple: this is a tavern waltz built to roar. The lyrics wink and flex in the same breath, and the chorus sticks like ale foam. If you want a quick frame - “Gaston” is a comic victory lap where the village brags a man into legend, and he happily supplies the legend. I listen for the bounce: three-beat swirl, punchy rhymes, a hook that doubles as a punchline. The lyrics keep tossing trophies at Gaston while the ensemble plays hype squad, which is the joke and the joy.

Song Meaning and Annotations

Original Broadway Cast of Beauty and the Beast performing Gaston — Performance energy baked into the cast recording.

At heart, “Gaston” is a social mirror. The town doesn’t just adore him - it manufactures him. The lyrics flatten nuance into a chant of superlatives, turning bravado into community sport.

No one’s slick as Gaston

The line is a meme before memes, a template that stacks jokes and status until the man is more slogan than person.

It’s also status comedy. LeFou functions like a hype man whose job is to inflate a brand.

No one’s quick as Gaston

The repetition sells exaggeration as truth, and the key joke is that everyone’s in on it - especially Gaston. The tavern setting makes it feel like folklore being drafted between rounds.

The waltz feel matters. That triple meter keeps the bragging buoyant, like a dancing brawl.

Give five hurrahs! Give twelve hip-hips!

You hear the stomp of boots and the swing of steins. That kinetic lift is why the number kills onstage: the music makes the boasting move.

The humor leans physical. A spit gag, a flex line, an absurd diet claim - it’s vaudeville with protein powder.

I’m especially good at expectorating

Comedy lands because the rhyme arrives with a rimshot, and the orchestra throws elbows in time.

Context sharpens the bit. In the broader story, “Gaston” contrasts Belle’s curiosity and the Beast’s growth with a guy who refuses to change.

As a specimen, yes, I’m intimidating

Broadway keeps the film’s joke but enlarges it for the room - thicker orchestration, punchier ensemble, crisp patter you can hear from the balcony.

The song’s afterlife underlines its utility. It worked in the 1991 film, it scales onstage with Burke Moses and Kenny Raskin, and it retools nicely for Luke Evans and Josh Gad in the 2017 remake - same chassis, new chrome.

No one shoots like Gaston

That portability is a Menken/Ashman specialty: melody and lyric that welcome staging gags without losing shape.

Message

“Gaston” skewers vanity by letting a crowd serenade it. The lyrics show how collective flattery forges a bully.

I use antlers in all of my decorating

In three minutes, you see the town’s values and the hero they deserve.

Emotional tone

Rowdy, comic, a little mean on the edges. The laughs land bright, but the subtext is sharp: unchecked swagger turns dangerous once the chorus becomes a mob.

Historical context

Born in the 1991 animated film, the number was refitted for Broadway in 1994, where it became track 9 on the Original Broadway Cast album. The 2017 live-action film revived it for a new generation, proving the hook hasn’t dulled.

Production

The cast recording credits Alan Menken and Bruce Botnick with music production, with Botnick handling recording and mix - you hear the studio snap in the brassy tuttis and the crisp gang vocals.

Instrumentation

Disney Broadway scale: reeds doubling (clarinet, flute, piccolo), brass punch, strings for sheen, harp and keyboards for color, drums and percussion to drive the stomp. That palette turns a pub number into a full-company showpiece.

Creation history

Beauty and the Beast premiered on Broadway April 18, 1994, with Burke Moses (Gaston) and Kenny Raskin (LeFou). The cast album followed that spring and cemented how the stage version reframed the film’s comic engine for live performance.

Verse Highlights

Scene from Gaston by Original Broadway Cast of Beauty and the Beast — Scene from ‘Gaston’ - tankards high, tempo higher.

Verse 1

LeFou sets the stage, selling Gaston’s myth while nudging him back to center. The rhyme density does the heavy lifting - short setups, big payoffs.

Chorus

The chant structure - “No one’s…” - turns into a factory of bragging rights. Each turn adds a new badge, the ensemble sealing it with unison shouts.

Bridge

Physical comedy lives here: the expectorating gag, the flex lines, the egg routine. It’s all heightened by the pit’s oom-pah lift.

Tag

The number swells to a toast, the last hurrahs ringing like a town decree. Curtain on charm, hint of menace.

Key Facts

Featured: Burke Moses (Gaston), Kenny Raskin (LeFou), Linda Talcott, Paige Price, Sarah Solie Shannon, ensemble.
Producer: Alan Menken, Bruce Botnick - music production; Botnick recorded and mixed.
Composer: Alan Menken; Lyricist: Howard Ashman.
Release Date (album): April 26, 1994 - some sources list June 20, 1994.
Genre: Show tune, Broadway.
Instruments (album personnel snapshot): reeds, brass, strings, harp, keyboards/synth, drums, percussion.
Label: Walt Disney Records.
Mood: Swaggering, comic, martial-waltz swing.
Length: 5:02 (track 9).
Language: English; Album: Beauty and the Beast: The Broadway Musical (Original Broadway Cast Recording).
Music style: pub-waltz in 3/4 with patter sections.
Notable later versions: Luke Evans & Josh Gad in the 2017 live-action film; Joshua Henry on ABC’s 30th Celebration.

Questions and Answers

What makes the “Gaston” lyrics so sticky onstage?: The template hook - “No one’s…” - invites call-and-response, lets jokes stack, and gives the chorus a simple, shoutable spine.
Who leads the Broadway recording, and how is it different from the film cut?: Burke Moses and Kenny Raskin headline the cast album; Broadway expands the ensemble punch, thickens orchestration, and leans into physical gags built for a live room.
Is “Gaston” a waltz?: Functionally, yes - it rides a triple meter that swings like a tavern dance, often felt around the 3-beat pulse.
Did the number travel beyond Broadway?: Absolutely. The 2017 live-action film features Luke Evans and Josh Gad, and ABC’s 2022 30th Celebration staged a fresh, high-gloss version with Joshua Henry.
Where does “Gaston” sit in the story arc?: It’s the comic reset after Belle’s rejection - a town pumping air into Gaston’s ego before the plot darkens into mob mentality.

Awards and Chart Positions

While the single “Gaston” wasn’t pushed as a charting track, the Original Broadway Cast Recording earned a Grammy nomination for Best Musical Show Album and was certified Gold by the RIAA on December 7, 2000. The show itself scored nine Tony nominations, with Ann Hould-Ward winning for Costume Design.

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