Be More Chill PT. 1 Lyrics
Squip, Jeremy, Mall PeopleBe More Chill PT. 1
THE SQUIP:
Take your hands out of your pockets
Arch your back, puff out your chest
Add some swagger to your gate or
You'll look like a masturbator
Fix your posture, then the rest
JEREMY:
But I AM a masturbator--
THE SQUIP:
We'll fix that
All your nerdiness is ugly
JEREMY:
Nerd? I thought I was more of a geek, but--
THE SQUIP:
All your stammering's a chore
JEREMY:
Wh-wh-what?
THE SQUIP:
Your tics and fidgets are persistent
And your charm is non-existent
Fix your vibe, then fix some more
Buh
JEREMY:
Wha?
THE SQUIP:
Buh
JEREMY:
Wha?
THE SQUIP:
No
JEREMY:
Aah!
THE SQUIP:
Stop
Oh, everything about you is so terrible
Whoa, everything about you makes me wanna die
JEREMY:
Jesus Christ...
THE SQUIP:
So don't freak out
And don't resist
And have no doubt
If I assist
You will
Be more chill
First thing's first, go buy a new shirt
JEREMY:
What's wrong with my shirt--
THE SQUIP:
It's better if you just comply
My job's to color your aesthetic
And make you seem much less pathetic
Just step and fetch, don't ask me why
JEREMY:
How are you with math homework?
THE SQUIP:
I'm a super-computer, Jeremy. I'm made of math.
Oh, everything about you is so terrible
PEOPLE IN THE MALL:
Everything about you sucks!
Everything about you sucks!
THE SQUIP:
Whoa, everything about you makes me wanna die
PEOPLE IN THE MALL:
Everything about you sucks!
Everything about you sucks!
THE SQUIP + PEOPLE IN THE MALL:
All the people in the mall
Think you're such a slob
PEOPLE IN THE MALL:
You're a slob!
Terrible!
Such a slob!
THE SQUIP:
And boy, can I see why!
Now you try picking out a shirt.
That's a girl's shirt.
JEREMY:
Sorry...
CHLOE:
...Jerry?
JEREMY:
Jeremy.
CHLOE:
You shop here?
JEREMY:
Oh, yeah all the time--
THE SQUIP:
Never.
JEREMY:
Never. Is what I meant to...
THE SQUIP:
Greet the beta.
JEREMY:
Oh. Hey, Brooke.
THE SQUIP:
"You look sexy."
JEREMY:
I can't say that to a hot girl!
THE SQUIP:
Don't smile. Stare intesnsely.
Speak like you don't care about your own death.
JEREMY:
Lookin' pretty sexy, Brooke.
BROOKE:
Thanks.
CHLOE:
Is that a girl's shirt?
JEREMY:
No.
THE SQUIP:
"Yes."
JEREMY:
Yes.
THE SQUIP:
Repeat after me--
I saw it in the window
And I couldn't dismiss
JEREMY:
I saw in the window
And I couldn't dismiss
THE SQUIP:
I was dating a girl and
She had a shirt just like this
JEREMY:
I was dating a girl and
She had a shirt just like this
THE SQUIP:
It's still painful
JEREMY:
It's still painful
CHLOE:
So, who was this mystery girl?
JEREMY:
Oh, you've probably never heard of her, so--
THE SQUIP:
Madeline
JEREMY:
Madeline
CHLOE:
What?
JEREMY:
She's French
CHLOE:
Ugh! She is NOT French! She just pretends to be for attention!
BROOKE:
Madeline broke up with you?
JEREMY:
Yeah...
THE SQUIP:
No.
JEREMY:
I mean--
THE SQUIP:
I broke up with her
JEREMY:
I broke up with her
THE SQUIP:
'Cause she was
Cheating on me
JEREMY, overselling it:
'Cause she was
Cheating on me
THE SQUIP:
Hey, Hamlet. Be more chill.