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Musical: Next to Normal
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DR. MADDEN (spoken): The pink ones are taken with food, but not with the white ones. The white ones are taken with the round yellow ones, but not with the triangle yellow ones. The triangle yellow ones are taken with the oblong green ones with food, but not with the pink ones. If a train is leaving New York at 120 mph and another train is leaving St. Petersburg at the same time, but going backward, which train... DAN: Who's crazy, the husband or wife? Who's crazy to live their whole life believing that somehow things aren't as bazaar as they are? Who's crazy, the one who can't cope? Or maybe, the one who'll still hope? The one who sees doctors or the one who just waits in the car? And I was a wild twenty-five, and I loved a wife so alive. But now I believe I would settle for one who can drive. DR. MADDEN (spoken): ...The round blue ones with food, but not with the oblong white ones. The white ones with the round yellow ones, but not with the trapezoidal green ones. Split the green ones into thirds with a tiny chisel, and if need be... DIANA: My psychopharmacologist and I. It's like an odd romance: Intense and very intimate, we do our dance. My psychopharmacologist and I. Call it a lover's game. He knows my deepest secrets. I know his... name! And though he'll never hold me He'll always take my calls. It's truly like he told me Without a little lift, the ballerina falls. CAST: Do doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo. DR. MADDEN (spoken): Goodman, Diana: Bipolar depressive with delusional episodes. Sixteen year history of medication. Adjustment after one week. DIANA (spoken): I've got less anxiety but I have headaches, blurry vision, and I can't feel my toes. CAST: Ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh. DR. MADDEN (spoken): So we'll try again. Eventually, we'll get it right. DIANA (spoken): Not a very exact science, is it? CAST: Zoloft and Paxil and Buspar and Xanex, Ambien, Prozac, Ativan calms me when I see the bills. These are a few of my favorite pills. DIANA (spoken): Thank you, Doctor, Valium is my favorite color. How'd you know? [Stage left, lights up on Henry and Natalie. Henry is playing the piano.] NATALIE (spoken): That's nice, I mean, for jazz. HENRY (spoken): I am totally pretending you didn't say it that way. NATALIE (spoken): It's just that, the thing with jazz is, how do you ever know if you got it right? It's just making shit up! HENRY (spoken): Which is also known as an act of creation. NATALIE (spoken): Oh, you're one of those pretentious stoner types. HENRY (spoken): Darling, I'm not pretentious. I'm definitely not classical. So rigid and structured, there's no room for improvisation; you have to play the notes on the page. NATALIE (spoken): Yeah, and what did Mozart know anyway? He should've just smoked a bowl and jammed on Twinkle Twinkle Little Star! HENRY (spoken): And they said you weren't funny... [Stage right.] DR. MADDEN (spoken): Goodman, Diana: Second adjustment after three weeks. Delusions less frequent, but depressive state worse. DIANA (spoken): I'm nauseous and I'm constipated, completely lost my appetite and gained six pounds, which, you know, is just not fair. CAST: May cause the following side effects, one or more: Dizziness, drowsiness, sexual dysfunction, headaches and constipation, nightmares and seizures. Anxiousness, anger, insomnia, nervousness, lethargy, nausea, vomiting, bad taste in clothes and sexual partners. OH! and one last thing: Use may be fatal. Use may be fatal. Use may be fatal. DR. MADDEN (spoken): Goodman, Diana: Third adjustment after five weeks. Reports continue: mild anxiety and some lingering depression. [Stage left.] NATALIE (spoken): I've wasted, like, weeks of practice with you in here, improvising. HENRY (spoken): Oscar Peterson, groundbreaking jazz pianist, classically trained. [Stage right.] DIANA (spoken): I now can't feel my fingers or my toes. I sweat profusely for no reason. [Stage left.] NATALIE (spoken): Beethoven did cocaine. HENRY (spoken): Miles Davis went to Juilliard. NATALIE (spoken): Mozart wrote poems about farts. [Stage right.] DIANA (spoken): Fortunately, I have absolutely no desire for sex. Although, whether that's the medicine or the marriage is anybody's guess. DR. MADDEN (spoken): I'm sure it's the medicine. DIANA (spoken): Oh, thank you, that's very sweet, but my husband's waiting in the car. DAN: Who's crazy, the one who's half gone? Or maybe, the one who holds on? Remembering when she was twenty, and brilliant and bold. And I was young, and so dumb. And now I am old. [Overlapped singing of DAN and DIANA] DAN: And she was livin' and wired. The sex was simply inspired. Now there's no sex, she's insane, And me, I'm just tired, tired, tired, tired... DIANA: And though he'll never hold me He'll always taken my calls It's truly like he told me Without a lift the ballerina falls. My psychopharmacologist and I... [Chaotic, incomprehensible duet continues] DAN (his voice emerges): ..or the one who just lives with the pain? They say love is blind... But believe me, love is insane. DR. MADDEN (spoken): Goodman, Diana: Seven weeks. DIANA (spoken): I don't feel like myself. I mean, I don't feel anything. DR. MADDEN (spoken): Hm. Patient stable. [Thanks to Sharon for lyrics] Back to main page: Next to Normal Lyrics
Broadway Next to Normal Lyrics
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