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Musical: New Brain
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GORDON SCHWINN Sorry I'm late, Rhoda. RHODA You're always late. GORDON SCHWINN I was working on the spring song. Is he angry that he doesn't have the Spring Song yet? I bet. RHODA No, he's angry that he doesn't have the yes song. GORDON SCHWINN I hate the Yes Song. I hate the Spring Song. I hate Mr. Bungee and his job. It's bad, working on Mr. Bungee's lilypad. WAITRESS Y'all work for Mr. Bungee? I love that tv show! The specials today, though not many, are especially good. First, the fish of the day- Calamari! Which isn't a fish, but lives in the sea, as set in the dish, it happens to be the fish of the day. Okay. Plus there's ziti with a sauce that's meaty. It's fun! SCHWINN AND RHODA Fun? WAITRESS And there's a lot. And that's the specials! Thank you! GORDON SCHWINN I'll have the ziti, and a diet coke. RHODA Uh okay, and I will have the goat cheese salad. No cheese. GORDON SCHWINN Thank you. RHODA So talk to me. GORDON SCHWINN It's taking up the brunt of my time. RHODA It's called a job. GORDON SCHWINN I don't have time to write my real stuff. It feels like I can't express what I mean to convey so of course I didn't write enough today! RHODA If you don't keep writing you'll be shown the door. You know Mr. Bungee hates you. GORDON SCHWINN I think Mr. Bungee... RHODA ...I think he hates you more GORDON SCHWINN Why does Mr. Bungee hate me? RHODA First off: You've gotta finish a song You scoff, but damnit, write the Spring Song! Write the Yes Song Don't let your career go to the dogs! GORDON SCHWINN As you can tell, I don't write well for frogs. "Mr. Bungee is aquatic and dispotic." I'm getting frog hallucinations! "Mr. Bungee's oceanic and satanic! ahaha. Mr. Bungee's said to be tyrannical at times. But Mr. Bungee always rhymes!" He's not here right now, is he? WAITRESS I love Mr. Bungee, yes indeedy, here's your ziti! I love Mr. Bungee when he makes his scene. I love Mr. Bun- did someone order scallopini? I love Mr. Bungee, here's your diet coke and here's your drinks. I love Mr. Bungee, I love Mr. Bungee! RHODA First write your song then next you'll write the epic. First tv then next a Broadway show. It's a rocky road from lilypad to where you want to get to dear, but Rhoda always knows. GORDON SCHWINN Inside me I feel washed up and through. RHODA Oh come on... GORDON SCHWINN Writing this shit's killed my talent. RHODA That is not true! GORDON SCHWINN And whatever's left to kill then Bungee will grind that down to squat! I used to be.. RHODA You still- GORDON SCHWINN I was! RHODA I don't agree- GORDON SCHWINN I once was but I'm not! Oh my- RHODA Hey come on, sit down. GORDON SCHWINN Something is wrong... RHODA Gordon, are you okay? GORDON SCHWINN Something is wrong... RHODA Gordon, you're scaring me.
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