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Musical: Jerry Springer: the Opera
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[JERRY (spoken)] So, Montel, what's on your mind? [MONTEL] I've been seeing Andrea here, And we're in love, We're in love, We're in love! [JERRY (spoken)] And what is it that you want to tell Andrea? [MONTEL] Well, Jerry... [JERRY (spoken)] Don't talk to me. Talk to Andrea. [MONTEL] Baby, I love you with all of my heart, But there is one thing you could do for me, Which could change my life! Change my life! [ANDREA] Tell me, baby! Tell me, baby! [MONTEL] Well, baby... [ANDREA] Tell me, baby! Tell me, baby! [MONTEL] Well, baby... [ANDREA] Tell me, baby! Tell me, baby! Tell me, baby! Tell me, baby! Tell me! [MONTEL] I wanna be your baby, baby. [ANDREA] You are my baby, baby! [MONTEL] What I mean is... I wanna be your BABY. [ANDREA] ...What? [MONTEL] Be your BABY. [ANDREA] You've gotta be kidding... [MONTEL] Be your baby, be your baby. [ANDREA] You've gotta be kidding... [MONTEL] Be your baby, be your baby. [ANDREA] Tell me this is bullshit! [MONTEL] Babe, I wanna be your baby, baby! B-A-B with a Y! B-A-B-Y! [ANDREA] What the fuck?! What the fuck?! Jesus Christ! What're you saying?! [MONTEL] If baby gets bad, if baby gets slack, Mama give B-A-B-Y big, big smack! [ANDREA] Montel, what're you saying? [MONTEL] Baby! [ANDREA] Stop it! What the fuck is happening here? [MONTEL] Baby! [ANDREA] Stop it! [MONTEL] Baby! [ANDREA] Watch it! Montel! Montel, what the fuck is going on here? [MONTEL] Mama get all angwy. [ANDREA] Stop it, Montel! Stop it! [JERRY (spoken)] Andrea, you seem upset. What is it you want to say to Montel? [ANDREA] Montel... [MONTEL] Mama. [ANDREA] Stop this. [MONTEL] Mama. [ANDREA] We can... [MONTEL] Mama. [ANDREA] ...work it out! [MONTEL] It mean a lot to me, baby. [ANDREA] Get some therapy! [MONTEL] It would help in the bed department! [ANDREA] ...Bed department? [MONTEL] Yes! [ANDREA] Are you saying I'm bad in bed?! [MONTEL] No, baby! [ANDREA] What then? [MONTEL] Well... [ANDREA] Spit it out! Spit it out! Are you trying to say you're gay?! [MONTEL] No, baby! It's so very hard... [ANDREA] Put some pants on! Be a man, And tell me! Tell me! [MONTEL] Well... [ANDREA] What? [MONTEL] It's... [ANDREA] What? [MONTEL] Er... [ANDREA AND ENSEMBLE] What?! [JERRY'S INNER VALKYRIE] Please don't tell us, We can guess! [JERRY (spoken)] Will you get out of my head?! I'm working here! Now get out! [Thanks to Beth for lyrics] Back to main page: Jerry Springer: the Opera Lyrics
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