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Chick With A Dick / Talk To The Hand

Chick With A Dick / Talk To The Hand lyrics

Chick With A Dick / Talk To The Hand

Chick With A Dick

AUDIENCE
Chick with a dick!

TREAMONT
I am a man

AUDIENCE
Chick with a dick!

TREAMONT
I am a man

AUDIENCE
Chick with a dick!

TREAMONT
I am a ma-a-a-a-a-a-a-an!
ma-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-an!
ma-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-an!
I'm a man!
I'm a man!

Talk To The Hand

WARM UP MAN:
Tacky! Tack-tack-tack tacky queen!

AUDIENCE:
Tacky! Tack-tack-tack tacky queen!

TREMONT:
You can hush all your shouting, you can hush all your bitching,
you can talk to the hand, cos the face aint listening!

AUDIENCE:
Loser! Loser!

TREMONT:
Talk to the hand!

AUDIENCE:
Loser!

TREMONT:
Talk to the hand!

AUDIENCE:
Loser!

TREMONT:
Talk to the hand!

AUDIENCE:
Loser!

TREMONT:
...cos the face aint listening!

AUDIENCE:
Loser! Faggot!

TREMONT:
Look at little piggy, see how she squeal, my advice for you bitch, get a face peel!

AUDIENCE:
Loser! Loser! Butt boy!

TREMONT:
...to the hand!

AUDIENCE:
Loser! Loser! Butt boy!

TREMONT:
Hush your dirty mouth, my tubby lady chimp,
lose the facial hair and you might find a pimp!

AUDIENCE:
Loser! Loser! Lo-ser!

TREMONT:
To the hand!

AUDIENCE:
You so tragic, you so sad! Cos your brother is your dad!

TREMONT:
Talk to the hand!

AUDIENCE:
You so scum, you so dumb, cos you live off gay men's cum!

TREMONT:
Do you want some, do you want some?

AUDIENCE:
Come and get it, come and get it!

TREMONT:
Do you want some, do you want some?

AUDIENCE:
Come and get it, come and get it!

TREMONT:
When you're dead and buried in the grass, I'll dig you up and fuck you up the ass!

AUDIENCE:
Talk to the hand!

TREMONT:
Cos the face aint listening!

AUDIENCE:
Talk to the hand!

TREMONT:
Cos the face aint listening!

AUDIENCE:
Talk to the hand! (repeated)

TREMONT:
Na-na-na-na-na-na-na (continued)

AUDIENCE:
Talk to the hand cos the face aint listening, talk to the hand,

TREMONT:
To the hand to the hand!

AUDIENCE:
Talk to the hand

TREMONT:
To the hand,

AUDIENCE:
To the...

AUDIENCE:
Vomit! Vomit! Vomit! Puke our guts up! Sin! Sin! Kill all gays! Kill all gays!

JERRY (spoken):
Welcome to the show, Tremont.
Now, let me get this straight, she says she's his, she says he's hers, they say he's theirs,
I guess you're saying he's yours, so what's going on?

TREMONT:
She said that he said that I said, that I said that he said that she said,
that they said that she said we both said that he
said that I said that you said something or other, I forget!

TREMONT, DWIGHT, PEACHES, and ZANDRA:
She said that he said that I said, that I said that he said that they said...

TREMONT:
She said that he said that I said that we said they both said that
I said that she said that I said that she said

ZANDRA (at the same time):
He is mine! He is mine!

PEACHES (at the same time):
I don't think so, I don't think so!

TREMONT, DWIGHT, PEACHES and ZANDRA:
He said that you said, he said that you said...

TREMONT:
Does it really matter?

DWIGHT, PEACHES and ZANDRA:
What?

TREMONT:
Does it really matter?

DWIGHT, PEACHES and ZANDRA:
What?

TREMONT:
Cos, at the end of the day I--
I--
I--
I love you. I love you.

AUDIENCE:
Chick with a dick with a heart!

TREMONT:
I love you! I love you!

AUDIENCE:
Chick with a dick with a heart!

TREMONT:
I love yo--u
yo--u

AUDIENCE:
Chick with a dick with a heart!

AUDIENCE:
Ladyboy! Nothing but a ladyboy! Fuck the faggot! Butt boy!

DWIGHT, PEACHES and ZANDRA:
What the fuck, what the fuck, what the fucking fucking fuck?

JERRY (spoken):
Okay, Dwight, who's it going to be?

DWIGHT:
I want my baby back, Peaches, baby, please come back!
They dont mean shit to me! They just whores and douche bags.

AUDIENCE:
Steve. Steve.

JERRY (spoken):
Well Peaches it's your call, where do we go from here?

PEACHES:
You don't see me cry. You don't see me cry. I just sing and die. Bisexual, bye bye!

PEACHES and WARM UP MAN:
Bisexual, bye bye.

AUDIENCE (softly):
Bisexual, bye bye (repeated).

PEACHES:
You're just a tramp!

DWIGHT:
Come on, baby!

PEACHES:
You're just a crack whore!

ZANDRA:
It wasnt me it was the smack!

PEACHES:
You're just a butt plugging, cum loving man loving

TREMONT:
Talk to the hand...

PEACHES:
...guy sucking, sodomising, crack head, man whore

TREMONT:
Talk to the hand...

PEACHES:
Losers!

AUDIENCE:
Losers! Losers! Losers!

JERRY (spoken):
More secrets after these commercials, dont go away!
Last Update: June, 10th 2013


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Musical: Jerry Springer: the Opera. Song: Chick With A Dick / Talk To The Hand. Broadway musical soundtrack lyrics. Song lyrics from theatre show/film are property & copyright of their owners, provided for educational purposes