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Dress Big Lyrics > Frogs, The

Dress Big Lyrics


HERAKLES:
You gotta dress big,
Dress bold,
Dress large.
You gotta look forceful
And resourceful
And in charge.
You wanna dress mean,
Not clean --
Aggressive.
[Flexes his muscles]

DIONYSOS:
Very impressive.

HERAKLES:
Gotta dress massive,
Not passive.
[Flexes again]

DIONYSOS:
Very imprassive.

HERAKLES:
Gotta dress fierce
And raw
And hairy.
More than just prominent,
Predominantly
Scary.
It's not the real you, I guarantee you,
That'll see you
Through this gig.
It's the rig,
You dig?
Dress big.

What do you have in that bag?

DIONYSOS:
Well fortunately, I packed several different ensembles.

HERAKLES:
Like what?

DIONYSOS:
Well, I have this in gold, blue and magenta...

HERAKLES:
Any weapons?

DIONYSOS:
Only my rapier wit.

HERAKLES:
It isn't enough
To be
A god.
You gotta convey it
With a deity's
Fa?ade.

A god should look godlike,
With a bod like --
Well, like mine.

DIONYSOS:
You're the meaning of divine.

HERAKLES:
And so that's who you'll be.

DIONYSOS:
What's who I'll be?

HERAKLES:
You'll pretend to be me.

DIONYSOS:
Oh, no, no, no -- that's a bit of a stretch.

HERAKLES:
You flaunt a few furs,
You drape a few skins,
You hang a few pelts.

DIONYSOS:
[Helpfully, gesturing to his outfit]
I have this in sable.

HERAKLES:
Takes more than a mink
To make people think
You're somebody else.

DIONYSOS:
Perhaps a hat?

HERAKLES:
You gotta wear everything you've killed,
Which oughta help cover up your build.
Just let 'em see this, boy, they'll be chilled.
Not to say thrilled...

Here, try this lionskin on for size. [He puts the lionskin on DIONYSOS.]

DIONYSOS:
Oh, my!

HERAKLES:
The vine leaves have to go.

DIONYSOS:
But it's my signature!

HERAKLES:
Not any more. You're gonna have to be me.

DIONYSOS:
Very well...

HERAKLES:
[Satisfied]
Better.

You gotta look messy,
Not saucy.
Less dressy,
More bossy.
Be mussy,
Not glossy.
[DIONYSOS smoothes out a wrinkle.]
Too fussy.
[DIONYSOS tilts his head forward rakishly.]
Too Fosse.

You're fighting the outfit and the outfit's winning. Stomach in! Chest out! Head up! Atta boy!
[He takes DIONYSOS to the mirror]

DIONYSOS:
Oh! Well, I -- I hate to admit it, but this actually looks better on me than it does on you.

HERAKLES:
Some people can't wear lion, you can.

DIONYSOS:
Yes, and I like what it's saying. It says I'm a warrior, but I make my own clothes. Xanthias, how do I look?

XANTHIAS:
Like the circle of life has stopped.

HERAKLES:
You don't walk, you stride.
You don't amble, you don't sidle.
You remind them you're an idol.

DIONYSOS:
Well, you don't expect me to carry that gigantic club around, do you?

HERAKLES:
What kind of a god are you?

DIONYSOS:
The kind with lower back problems.

HERAKLES:
And don't say, "lower back problems." Say:
"I have a spine of steel!"

You don't talk, you growl.
[DIONYSOS growls timidly]
You don't mutter things, you roar 'em.
[DIONYSOS growls a bit louder]
As for matters of decorum,
Ignore 'em.

You gotta act big
And loud
And rough.

DIONYSOS:
And that's enough?

HERAKLES:
As long as you swear a lot
And wear a lot
Of stuff.

DIONYSOS:
[Not very convincingly]
Damn. Fooey.

HERAKLES:
You gotta speak firmer --

DIONYSOS:
[Lowering his voice and stamping his foot]
Damn! Fooey!

HERAKLES:
Don't murmur --

DIONYSOS:
[Growing in volume]
Damn!! Fooey!!

HERAKLES:
Don't mumble --
[Growling in a low bass]
Rumble --

[DIONYSOS roars like a lion]

By George, he's got it!

HERAKLES, XANTHIAS:
[to DIONYSOS]
I think you've got it!

DIONYSOS:
[Menacingly, to HERAKLES]
You talkin' to me?
You talkin' to me?!

[He punches HERAKLES square in the stomach]

HERAKLES:
That's it, now glower --

DIONYSOS:
Butt out!

HERAKLES:
-- To show your power.

DIONYSOS:
So's your old man!

HERAKLES:
Watch how they cower
As your power
Starts to flower.

DIONYSOS:
Stick it in your ear!

HERAKLES:
What you'll discover
Is that people think the cover
Is the book.
It's all in the look.
So look like the oak
Instead of the twig.

DIONYSOS:
Blow it out your ass!

HERAKLES:
Walk tall!
Stand proud!
Look fierce!
Talk loud!
Dress big!
Last Update: June, 10th 2013

Frogs, The Lyrics

  1. Act 1
  2. Opening Fanfare
  3. Invocation and Instructions to the Audience
  4. We Are Off On a Great Mission
  5. I Love to Travel
  6. Dress Big
  7. I Love to Travel (reprise)
  8. All Aboard
  9. On the River Styx
  10. Ariadne
  11. The Frogs
  12. Act 2
  13. Hymn to Dionysos
  14. Hades
  15. It's Only a Play
  16. Shaw
  17. The Contest
  18. Fear No More
  19. All Aboard (reprise)
  20. Hymn to Dionysos (reprise)
  21. Final Instructions to the Audience

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