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Is It A Crime?

Is It A Crime? lyrics

Is It A Crime?

ELLA
Mother and Dad handed down to me
A bit of their own philosophy.
I've stuck to it like an obedient daughter,
But it always lands me in hot water.
I'd gladly follow out your suggestions
If you'd give me the answers to these questions.
Please tell me:

Is it a crime to start each day
With a laugh, and a smile, and a song?
And is it a crime to end each day
With a laugh, and a smile, and a song?
Is it wrong, is it a crime
To call the world your valentine?
Is it a crime to grab a lamp-post
And then sing "Sweet Adeline?"
I ask you
Is it a crime to save a wee
Baby bird when it falls from its nest?
That little bird should have a chance
To fly like all the rest.
So if it's a crime to help old ladies cross the
street,
Then put me in jail
Without bail,
Bread and water from an old tin pail,
If that's, if that's a crime.

Is it a crime...
Inspector, I'm puzzled.
We're taught two things as we go through life:
One, "Be thy brother's keeper,"
And two, "Mind your own business."
(With a laugh, and a smile, and a song.)
Now, if I know something, and by telling it to someone
in distress,
I could change that person's life and bring them the
bluebird of happiness,
Is it a crime to tell him, or is it a crime not to?
Is it that you mustn't, or you've got to?
Should you say: "Hey, watch out for that banana peel,
bud,"
Or just remain silent and then laugh as he crashes
with a thud?
Inspector, my job is to get messages to people on
time!
If I have a job, and I see it through,
And it's just my duty that I do, do, do,
Is that, is that --
Inspector, let's go back a few thousand years.
If there had been answering services then, and if it
had been up to me,
I could have changed the course of history.
I could have prevented many a famous tragedy.
(With a laugh, and a smile, and a song.)
Why, every night I lie awake, and my cheeks grow
soaking wet
When I think of what I could have done for Romeo and
Juliet.
"Hello, Verona-Phone. Oh, yes, Mr. Romeo! Juliet
Capulet called. The message is: 'To avoid getting
married to other fellow, am playing dead. Friar
Laurence gave me a great big sleeping pill, but when I
wake up, we'll head for the border.' Oh, don't thank
me, it's all in a day's work."
See what I could have done?
Maybe I'm right,
Maybe I'm wrong,
But if I got that message through on time, I'm telling
you,
THOSE TWO KIDS WOULD BE ALIVE TODAY!!!

So if it's a crime to help old ladies cross the
street,
Then I confess!
I'm just a mess!
Mother and Dad, you were wrong, I guess!
Inspector, were they wrong?

[Inspector Barnes hands her a handkerchief.]

Thank you.
Last Update: June, 10th 2013


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Musical: Bells Are Ringing. Song: Is It A Crime?. Broadway musical soundtrack lyrics. Song lyrics from theatre show/film are property & copyright of their owners, provided for educational purposes